Ａｎｏｔｈｅｒ Ｄａｙ
The ｌｅｔｔｅｒｓ ａｒｅ ｗｅｉｒｄ ｃｕｚ ITS ａ ｊａｐ ｃｏｍ ｓｏ ｐａｒｄｏｎ ｔｈｅ ｅｎｇｌｉｓｈ ｋ？ ｕｓｉｎｇ ｉｔ ａｌｒｅａｄｙ ｗａｓｔｅｓ ｌｏｔｓ ｏｆ ｔｉｍｅ． Ｔｏｄａｙ ｗｅ ｗｅｎｔ ｔｏ ｔｈｅ ｚｏｏ ｉｎ ｈｏｋｋａｉｄｏ． Ｉ ｌｌ ｈａｖｅ ｔｏ ｓａｙ ｉｍ ｓｕｒｐｒｉｓｅｄ ｂｙ ｈｏｗ ｗｅｌｌ ｔｈｅ ｚｏｏ ｗａｓ ｃｏｎｓｔｒｕｃｔｅｄ， ｅｖｅｒｙ ｅｘｉｔ ｌｅａｄｉｎｇ ｔｏ ａｎ ｅｎｔｒａｎｃｅ， ａｎｄ ａ ｃｉｒｃｕｌａｒ ｍｏｖｅｍｅｎｔ ａｒｏｕｎｄ ｔｏ ｚｏｏ ｔｉｌｌ ｔｈｅ ｅｎｄ． Ｂｒｉｌｌｉａｎｔ ｃｏｎｓｔｒｕｃｔｉｏｎ ｂｙ ｔｈｅ ｊａｐａｎｅｓｅ． Ａｎｄ ｉｔ ｉｓ ｖｅｒｙ ｃｈｉｌｄｒｅｎ ｆｒｉｅｎｄｌｙ， ｗｉｔｈ ａｌｌ ｔｈｅ ｅｎｃｌｏｓｕｒｅｓ ＭＡＤＥ ｗｉｌｌ ｗｅｌｌ ｔｈｏｕｇｈｔ ａｃｃｕｒａｎｃｙ ｓｏ ｔｈａｔ ｅｖｅｎ ｃｈｉｌｄｒｅｎ ｈａｖｅ ａ ｃｌｅａｒ ｖｉｅｗ． ＴＨＥ ＲＡＣＯＯＮ ｗａｓ ｓｏ ｃｕｔｅ！！！！ ｓｈｏｗ ｙｏｕ ａｌｌ ｗｈｅｎ ｉｍ ｂａｃｋ． Ｍｙ ｂｒｏ ｈａｄ ｔｏｎｓ ｏｆ ｅｎｊｏｙｍｅｎｔ ｆｒｏｍ ｓｉｔｔｉｎｇ ｏｎ ｔｈｅ ｌｉｔｔｌｅ ｋｉｄｄｙ ｒｉｄｅ． ｔｈｅ ｐａｎｄａ． ｓｈｏｗ ｕ ａｌｌ ｗｈｅｎ ｉｍ ｂａｃｋ ｔｏｏ． Ｔｈｉｓ ｃｏｍｐｕｔｅｒ ｉｓ ｔｈｅ ｏｎｅ ｉｎ ｔｈｅ Ａｌｐｉｎｅ Ｌｏｕｎｇｅ， ｓｏ ｖｅｒｙ ｈａｒｄ ｔｏ ｔｙｐｅ． Ｓｏ ｉｍ ｎｏｔ ｇｏｎｎａ ｔｙｐｅ ｔｏ ｌｏｎｇ．
Ｔｈｅ ａｌｔａｒ ａｎｄ ｔｈｅ ｄｏｏｒ ｉｓ ｂｒｉｌｌｉａｎｔ ｂｙ ｔｈｅ Ｃａｓｔｉｎｇ Ｃｒｏｗｎｓ． Ｓｏ ｉｓ Ｃａｕｇｈｔ ｉｎ ｔｈｅ Ｍｉｄｄｌｅ． Ｍｕｓｔ ｌｉｓｔｅｎ ｐｅｏｐｌｅ． Ｐｅａｃｅ．
Aitai
There was a ’sky festival’ Sora Matsuri, in Hakkaido today, and we went to participate in it. It is a festival for to fight for the environment using a very very peaceful festival. It was a festival to raise awareness of the environment, and it was real good, even though the crowd wasn’t anime like. The acting and songs sure was though 
Our friend’s brother, Masashi-san was performing, and it was realli touching. Some of his friends shed namida (Tears). There is this one song if I remember correctly, about the sky. How great it is, and he descrbed it as the thing which, no matter where we are, we look up, and everybody sees the same thing. Its like it connects all of us together. That all of us belong as one. In his song there was this part that repeated a single Japanese word. ‘Aitai’ I want to meet. I WANT TO MEET.
At that moment, I realised that maybe, just maybe, I havebeen doing something wrong. Remember the phrase ‘ seek and you’ll find’? I think, as a Christian, I know he exists, and that he is out there, more han the sky, connecting all of us, but MORE THAN THAT, saving us. And I believe that he is there. I know, in my heart. But…. do I want to meet HIM? MY heavenly Father? MY Christ th Messiah? Now?
It dawned on me that I never actually thought of something like that, that I am thinking everyday that I WANT to meet him. Aitai. Aitai.Aitai. And this isn’t a process. Its a feeling.
No does he want to meet him. No what will happen when I meet him. No how do I meet him. No I need to do what before I meet him. No later. Its not really an ACTION. Its a FEELING. Aitai. I want to meet him. More importantly, I feel that I want him here, near me. MEET HIM. AITAI. That feeling is so important. That seems to be the first step to seeking him. Oh only if I could feel this everyday, needing him, wanting him. But no. When I am most satisfied by materialistic wants, I cast him aside like a used toy.
Butfor that moment, when Masashi was singing. Aitai. Aitai. I felt it come, at a time most peaceful, most relaxed, when I did not supposedly need him, when I usually cast him aside. This time, one word brought me back to him. Aitai. I guess its the first time I felt genuinely wanting his presence, not because he is the one that has been there for my BURDENS, NEEDS, GUIDANCE, etc. But today, sitting there, I just want to have him by my side, everyday, everytime, every second that passes, to HAVE him IN my life because HE is God, my father, and only he satisfy me. Aitai. Yes. I wanna meet my father, my saviour. Aitai.
I’m in Japan!
Haha.. currently living in Shen Kiat’s friends house. His friend is super friendly. Her father is UBER friendly. AND has humour to boot. Splendid family. Their hospitality is amazing. And its not just the people.
The ‘food paradise’ of Singapore seems to have been put to same by Hokkaido’s jie bian tans. I blessed (Thank you God) to be able to taste the food in Hokkaido. Our food is good, but somehow pales in comparison to their food. ESPECIALLY health wise. SUPER HEALTHY, YET SUPER GOOD. They can make a jelly THAT HAS NO TASTE taste good (Whad’s hat sauce anyway. Amazing). And its only the 2nd day. Heh.
Had a discussion with my elder brother about the omiage (gifts) to buy for the church people. We will spilt. He will buy for certain people, I will buy for certain people. Although alot of people like shiroi kohibito, we found chocolate BETTER than that, so most prob gonna ship it back. Look forward to that But that’s not the point. We were discussing, and okane (money) very little. So we don’t want to double count for each person (Sorry, very stingy, heh). HOWEVER, my brother said ok, then this: “Except for Hui Shan. You buy one present, I buy one.” ……. Relli Zhong She Qing You MAXXXX!!!!
Anyway, its nt just nice food here. There’s nice scenery, and nice weather (Can you believe its 24 degrees in the midst of summer?!?). And we are going for a music performance by Shen Kiat’s friend’s brother, Masashi-san. Good job.
Thank you God for such a great time, and more ahead. I am blessed in your grace.
Suppression
God can really do anything. He is the king of kings, the lord of lords. Praises be sung to him from all his creations, and may his will be done on earth as it would be in heaven. The world resound of his glory, and his kingdom come.
I find myself struggling yet again, but praises to the lord most high, for all these only make me stronger, better equipped with all that is good to do the will of God. This time, my struggle is clearly one between faith and realism.
As a modern thinker, much actions taken are based upon sound and cautious deduction, as well as logically conclusion. Even with much faith in Christ whom I place all my life in, my action must be justified by his standards before I dare to take the actions. I find myself doing quite the opposite of what believers should become when they draw closer to God. The closer I abide and draw myself to him, the harder it is for me to choose a path that is willed by him. It stems from suppression.
The more I study the bible, the more I confine myself to the laws of what was written. BUT THE BOOK IS ALIVE, and God is alive. I follow a supposed ’system’ developed to gauge the extent of which my actions are within the boundaries of God’s will and standards, and judge for myself the consequences of my actions towards his ‘Good’. WRONG. absolutely wrong. Stupid dude.
After praying for wisdom and knowledge, I thank and praise the lord for bellowing them upon one as small as I am. But this wisdom and knowledge has subsequently stymied the simplest of steps in following God. To follow, you must walk. My thinking has prevented that.
I kept thinking God did not want me to go overseas to study, that he did not want me to apply for an overseas universities. With the brain that god bestowed me, I deduced that he wants me to stay, because it seemed the logical step. God given me many services to the church. If so, why would he want to remove me from all of it? Also, I thought my SAT scores do not reflect on him wanting me to go overseas. Furthermore, its like what everyone says. I’m not the type that is suited for overseas. Not responsible enough. With that, I happy conclude that I should stay in Singapore. JUST LIKE SATAN WANTS ME TO CONCLUDE.
Today, I had a small little breakthrough. Its just a small little step. My first step to following Jesus. The true wisdom of God finally dawned upon this foolish excuse of a man entrusted with ‘God’s wisdom’. I have confined God to teachings. To logic. To promises. To situations. To circumstances. To specific parts of the bible. I have not allowed him to MAKE ME WHOLE. All his teachings. All he is. All he does. I suppress his greatness to that which is governed by the law, the surrounding, the situation at hand, and failed to see the TRUE greatness of THE LOGIC that God MAKES the law, the surrounding, the situations, AND has promised that ‘ALL THINGS WORK FOR THE GOOD FOR THOSE WHO LOVE HIM’. I felt ashamed, but nevertheless excited by the prospect of a contradiction to my stand, as I now know full well that I have failed to see the ‘plans I(he) have for you(me), plans to prosper and not to harm you.’, and there ARE plans yet to come. After all he has done for me, the blessings I counted, the praises I sang to him, I actually forgot: He can do MUCH MUCH more. “That’s it, God done for me so much already, I shall give the rest of my life for him”. Great Mentality. What about the part where he WILL CONTINUE to bless and prosper me?
My SATs score isn’t the highest. But if God wills, who am I to say that THAT SCORE CANNOT put me in the university of HIS choice? I screwed up big time. To think that I cannot enter because BY standards, I have not reached the average score. If God wills, then the lowest of scores will allow his child to enter. And all will know that it is not by his strength or ability, but by the power of God and his love for us. How could I forget? Who am I to say that God did not do this so that I WILL KNOW that it is only by his grace that I could enter? I stand now, ready for him to make a testimony out of me.
Today, it fills me with excitement and anticipation that God is the God of ‘ALL THINGS’, and that this ‘ALL THINGS’ work for MY GOOD. Holy, holy, holy. God all mighty. The world is FILLED with your glory.
Now what? Tell you what. I’ll take that little step I mentioned just now, and go apply for an overseas university. And from it, that will contribute to the ALL THINGS that will lead to my good. I just have to love him first, ad take that step to FOLLOW. I thank God for edifying my ‘wisdom’, and thank him for really giving me the wisdom that I truly seek. The wisdom of God, not man. And lord, make me smaller, just so you might become a BIGGER in my life, for you have really let the foolish teach the ‘wise’. Praises to the lord on high. Amen, amen, amen.
PS: Thank you lord for the wisdom and knowledge, but help me so that it may not become the very thing that brings me away from you. Lord, I believe that you alone, am. Help my unbelieve. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.
