Happy CNY, Worst Nightmare in my Life
And its too bad I will not be able to move around, or i would go to church to thank him for bringing me through this storm. Haha. NIWAE, since I will not be able to say happy Chinese New Year to all the peeps, I have decided to do it surreptitiously on my blog. Therefore, HAPPY CHINESE NEW YEAR PEEPS! Lol.
Hope you all have a pleasant new year, with lots of hong bao and nice food k? Dun forget to indulge in the long holiday break (4 days sia)… though I’m on twenty, hehe. Enjoy yourselves, but dun become to pig k? I’ll be fine in the boundaries of my comfortable tatami. Al those that wanna pass me my hong bao can do so by indirectly giving it to Tan Di Jie. Note that I need the money for the medical bills ya? Mwahaha (Sounds like i’m trying to get more more out of ya)! Btw, hope my brother have a fun foreign Chinese New Year! Never celebrated it would not family b4, but hey, its a first! Look forward to it!
The pain’s been getting from worse to worst. No bad. Everywhere around the wound hurts, my body seems to be radiating heat thanks to countless x-rays, and my eyes are starting to see double. Hope this is temporary. Sometimes it gets breathless too. But hey, at least God LETS me feel that ya? Better than not feeling it at all. That’ll mean… nvm.
Recently had a dream of the people I loved most. But it was hell of a nightmare. There was no God in my dream. No one to watch over everybody. Hong Wei and friends were gambling with big bucks, my brothers were slating away. Immorality covered the universe, I would not wanna go through it again. My younger brother was a big daddy pimp, with all the girls, but would even respond to me. My older brother was rich and of upperclassmen status, but only cares about money, treating me like dirt. Wei Jiat pursued only to become number one, trampling on everyone that gets in his way. Min was SMOKING, gambling with her brother. I look at them, reveling deeper into sin. I tried to talk them all out of it, but nobody had God’s spirit, their hearts hardened to the love I tried to give. I was mocked for my religion, beaten for my ‘conservativeness’. When I told all of them I love them, their response wa, “But I don’t.” Painful for me, but for some reason everyone was crying when they said that. Maybe they don’t want to be like that, but without God there is no protection. Their lives devoured one another. Is this what awaits those as stated in revelations? I can only imagine.
In the end, I got killed by a careless speeding bus driver. That was when I woke up. Whatever the case, I immediately prayed for God to be around us all, and praised him just for his presence. I prayed that he stay with us and not leave us behind. That he be there with everyone I ever crossed paths with, that my dream will NEVER be a reality.
“I will never leave you, I will never forsake you.”
What an assurance. Sometimes,when you cannot change anything, but at least we know we can turn to one God who can melt the hardened, and free the chained. In my dream, I could not do nuts. For my life and many others, God’s already proven that he can.
