The End of Christmas 2007
T’was the end of Christmas. Wanted to stay awake to watch ‘Blaze of Glory’ with my brothers and friends, but rationale thinking told me I had to sleep early to avoid the sleep monster during office hours. Sorry dudes.
Christmas was definitely worth the splurge I think. God has his own ways of returning everything I gave away, returning so much more to me. The love and encouragement from AGPC overflows, just like his love. I’m so glad I learn to trust him. In the festive season of thanks giving, I received quite a few interesting stuffs, as well as letters. Most notably out of all the letters, there was one that stated:
please continue to eat bananas. I think its the best thing that can happen to a banana.
Haha. Thanks Yue Ting. What a nice compliment. I think a lot of things have happend between last Christmas and this. No, It does not involve me giving my heart that was given away. But through the years I felt that I am starting to be shaped by God into a certain personality that he wills. Certain aspects of my character has definitely improved over the year, though it still needs a lot of honing if I were to meet expectations. However, I am glad I am changing.
Last year my brother gave me a letter, stating certain characteristics of a bass player:
1) Selfless
2) Giving
3) Able to hold people together
Theres more. However, I am starting to understand and become the bass that God desires. Putting aside the ocassional burst of slapping and plucking (that has NEVER happened when I’m really playing the song Wei Jiat, contrary to anything you think), I’ve learnt what it means to be sacrificing. The bassist needs to analyse the instruments around him and find a way to hold the music down and not let it float. He cannot be too flashy, as it would break the melody. The sound cannot clash with all the other instruments, or the lead will never be as good as it can sound. He needs to help the drums keep tempo, to amplify its effects. Nothing about the bassist is about himself. Its mostly about the people around him. Its not about producing your music, its about producing theirs. There is no limelight, sometimes no acknowledgement. You get hit hard when you cannot perform up to expectations, but will not get the praise the rest will get if they do well. You give without taking back.
Sometimes it gets to you. However, it is what the bible has said, to give without expecting something in return. Just like the bassist, my life has started to change. When asked to help people complete certain things, I’ll mostly agree. It may become tiring. Sometimes, its Really tiring. Sometimes, you get nothing back. Other times, you get a ‘thank you’. But, deep down inside, I’ve learnt to seek the favour of God before man, that every ounce of blood, tears and pespiration is being collected in a bottle God possess. If from the bottle he will drink to glorify his name, I’ll gladly make it full. Its not without its just rewards mind you. God has his ways of rewarding those that he is pleased in, often its so beautiful I just raise my head and hands to praise him immediately, wherever I am. Sometimes, I just break into tears.
The human reward, however, is to see the people around you being able to make their ‘music’. The time I sacrificed to give Ezra tuition to see him pass his economics and his father beaming from it; Wei Jiat, Hui shan, Yue Ting being able to complete their A’s unscathed; clearing the things and litter after a party so people can leave. A bassist help make other people’s music, holding them together. Your reward does not even belong to you.
I’m still far, far away from becoming God’s bassist. Nobody likes doing things without acknowledgement, and worse still start to become exploited by the very people you love. However, this year, I’ve slowly become okay with it. Even if I have to become the shadow of somebody, its okay. If I have to slug out a 24 hours plan to get everyone going, its okay. God has spoken to me that day I decided to become a bassist instead of a pianist who can steal the show. God has spoken to me. Acts, chapter 9:
‘He is my chosen instrument, I will let the world see how much he must suffer for my will.’
May your will be done on Earth as it will be in heaven. May I become his number 1 choice for a bassist when he wishes to listen to a live band.
~Christmas reflections from stoning on the way home from Orchard road to catch ‘Blaze of Glory’, 25/12/2007~
